Social media fuels comparison, envy and emotional stress, while conscious living helps protect inner peace and personal happiness
Monalisa Dash Dwibedy
These days it’s scary to open your heart to anyone. Even if you are drunk , do not share your grief with anyone until you truly know a person. If you happen to trust someone who has no integrity , the same person will use your grief as per their convenience to make you feel low even if that’s no longer a pain for you . You have moved on and living your best life . But the people you shared your thoughts with , they sat on it and kept stirring the shit until they are able to use your forgotten pain against you . This is the world around us now , many times I wonder, what kind of world we are living in !
What would you call such people who enjoy the pain and sadness of others? These days mostly people are happy seeing others in pain . Why this happens ? Most people keep comparing their lives with others ; so most of the time their own achievements fall short and they are unhappy as someone in their circle is better off than them in some way. So when person “A”who thinks person B is doing better than him/her becomes envious of “B”. Most of the cases , B does not know about this . If B shares his grief with A (thinking that by sharing his thoughts he will feel relieved.) , then A becomes happier thinking that “Thank goodness, the pain that B is going through, I don’t have that. “ . The person A who was so far comparing only his success with B’s , now starts comparing his own pain/ failures with B’s pain/failures. Sometimes the person A lowers his conscience to an extreme extent by judging B in all his actions in reference with the information that B shared with him . Then slowly A keeps feeding himself on the misery of the B’s situation . That’s when A becomes very sad himself , lowering himself to a different parasitic level. Parasites usually depend on others for their survival, but a human being becomes dangerously parasitic when they start feeling happy feeding upon other human beings misery.
Have you ever wondered why this is happening in 21st century? This was not the case in 70s or 80s because people did not know much about what’s happening in other peoples lives . People were minding their own lives. Now the social media is the most alarming and dusty place to be .Think about a person who has lost his job sees a post from his friend buying a luxury car . If you place yourself in the shoes of the person who lost the job, What will be your first thought of that post ? Exactly, I can hear you loud and clear . It’s not easy to digest a friend buying a brand new car on the day of your job loss. Now you see that another friend of yours has posted his vacation pics from Italy . Though none of your above friends know about your job loss , still you feel awful looking at their posts , is not it ? What you would have done that day if there was no social media platforms for your friends to brag about their latest car or expensive vacations ?
That day , when you lost your job , you would have come back home , spent some time with your loved ones , thinking and discussing with them what to do next . Then You may have thought about taking a country side vacation of your choice as there has been a long time you have taken one . After a relaxing vacation, you would have spent few more days to reflect on your financial situation taking a stock of your savings/investment so far and your monthly expenses. You would have come to realize that you have earned decently in past years and it will take care of you and your family for quite some time . Every day , you would have gone on a long walk and taken time to enjoy every moment of your day .You would have planted the a new tree in your backyard . You might have gone to a music festival or a broadway show. But none of the above things happened . All good things of your life that could have happened went south just because You saw your friends’ status in facebook and started looking another gig immediately as if a luxury car or a vacation in Italy was always on your list . No , those never made to your list so far . Just now you added them to you list as your friends have posted about them and you did compare your life with theirs .
You forgot that expensive cars were never your priority. You forgot that you have already travelled twenty five countries and Italy is just another one which you can travel whenever you want . You could have taken a ride on the entire job loss situation of yours and turned it in your favour but you did not do that . Your compulsive reaction took control and you started applying for jobs immediately instead of taking time to think what is best for you . You did not act consciously as you could have utilized this job loss situation to make yourself a more joyful and blissful person.
The above is an example of the overwhelming impact of social media on our lives. The platform which was made for us to stay connected with our friends and family has now become a playground of envy and fear. We are not focused on what we want as we are paying more attention to what others are doing in their life and in the process, we are not living our own lives .
The next time you meet one of your high school friends after 25 years, try not to take a picture just to post on the social media .Better to treasure the truly happy moments within . You don’t wanna your happiness bartered, compared and envied in the social media market .
(The writer is an IT Consultant living in Toronto. Views Expressed are Personal)
